wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Randomize
