How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
When did angry sex become our thing?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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