You really coming over, don't trick.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
