I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Randomize
