I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
