Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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