my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
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Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
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he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
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