I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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