Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
