The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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