living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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