How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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