If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I think I just sharted jello shots
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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