hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize