you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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