I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
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They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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