I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
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