Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I'm lost and stupid without you.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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