Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
