everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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