I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
