I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
You had me at "let me see your balls"
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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