Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I got inside last night via doggy door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize