You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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