Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
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