I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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