oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
