Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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