I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
