Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Porn is love you can see.

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  (586): Porn is love you can see. http://tfl.nu/c5qh
  Replies (9) Good night (1137) Bad night (654)
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  (607): View more from New York

  i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.

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  (607): i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change. http://tfl.nu/yfee
  Replies (18) Good night (4702) Bad night (826)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem

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  (704): the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem http://tfl.nu/ycgy
  Replies (10) Good night (3961) Bad night (681)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator

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  (781): the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator http://tfl.nu/8mwn
  Replies (32) Good night (12015) Bad night (1203)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.

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  (636): The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen. http://tfl.nu/0t44
  Replies (8) Good night (2971) Bad night (1023)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.

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  (503): no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week. http://tfl.nu/b65a
  Replies (14) Good night (1704) Bad night (2011)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.

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  (918): I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains. http://tfl.nu/wys7
  Replies (7) Good night (2509) Bad night (780)
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  (646): View more from New York

  Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.

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  (646): Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans. http://tfl.nu/r33v
  Replies (5) Good night (1203) Bad night (883)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!

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  (814): she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!! http://tfl.nu/3a3w
  Replies (4) Good night (1281) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow

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  (206): I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow http://tfl.nu/8ygv
  Replies (27) Good night (2415) Bad night (984)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.

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  (586): We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate. http://tfl.nu/plc2
  Replies (2) Good night (1806) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.

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  (561): The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year. http://tfl.nu/xsav
  Replies (2) Good night (1416) Bad night (466)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.

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  (304): Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened. http://tfl.nu/gr90
  Replies (8) Good night (2471) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.

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  (443): Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame. http://tfl.nu/nf1o
  Replies (3) Good night (313) Bad night (793)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.

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  (775): I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation. http://tfl.nu/xcew
  Replies (2) Good night (535) Bad night (248)

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