Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize