Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I'm bleeding and have questions
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