There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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