I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize