is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
