I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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