Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
