I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Randomize
