Well apparently he's into motor boating.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
