You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize