Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize