It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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