Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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