It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize