YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
She announced her abortion via fbk
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
