this boner is exhausting
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Randomize
