i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
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3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
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Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
At least life still wants to fuck me.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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