Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Randomize
