rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
