I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
