So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
